Uncategorized Writing Advice

How Not to Write a Screenplay-Horror

I intentionally wrote this garbage horror screenplay to honor Halloween!

Happy Halloween! This is my Halloween edition of the How Not to Write a Screenplay series. Enjoy.


Cornface, age unknown, a tall, slim, scarecrow man with a dirty old brown hat from rural Missouri, black button eyes, a knitted mouth, an orange-white checkered shirt and long pair of brown overalls is carrying a hoe across the windowless, medium-sized kitchen filled with appliances including a fridge, toaster, oven, microwave, blender, sink & more!

A couple of feet away from him is Amber, aged 28, three months and six days, is a local barista at her local cafe, a chain based in a relatively unknown smalltown in Eastern North Dakota, United States of America. Though she’s originally from upstate Rhode Island, there’s something about the air, the atmosphere of rural Maine that brought her here. She’s wearing a blue sweater with the logo of her favorite overpriced clothing brand, black jeans covered in little holes, and white and pink sneakers. Her haircolor is light brown, with a small dyed line of black towards the right. She’s also sporting a pair of matching silver earrings she got from a jewelery store in Boston, Massachusetts, United States of America.

Amber is preparing a ham and cheese omelette, she learned how to make the egg-dish in her college days, a fairly cheap way to have a decent meal while on a budget. Cornface raises his hoe. Amber slowly turns around. Cornface has dissapeared. Amber, slighty on-edge about having felt the presence of a paranormal scarecrow goes back to making her eggs. She cracks open the eggs, putting them into a cup, which she proceeds to whisk into a yellowy substance.

Cornface teleports back. He raises the hoe. Even though it shouldn’t be happening in a realistic world, nerve-inducing music plays in the background, our characters being unable to hear it. Cornface is about to go for the kill.

Have the screen go black and have a scream and a noise effect of be hearable to the audience.

-The Screenwriter

RIP Sean Connery

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